Well, the first night’s games have me in a 1-3 hole (surprise, surprise!) so let’s finish off the first round and jinx a few more teams shall we? Note to all playoff GM’s: I am not liable for any legal recourse for picking your team to be victorious.
Western Conference
(2) Chicago Blackhawks vs. (7) Nashville Predators
Players to Watch:
Antti Niemi, G, Blackhawks- Ask any hockey fan, casual or otherwise about this dude and the general response will be “doesn’t that guy kind of suck?” The short answer is “not really?” (notice the question mark). He’s not terrible, but he is inexperienced. It’s a widely held belief that the only thing holding the Hawks back from cruising to the finals is their goaltending. The first round is a good spot for this Finn to gain some confidence and start proving the doubters wrong.
Patric Hornqvist, RW, Predators- After being hit with a shot by teammate Shea Weber in the season’s final week, Hornqvist’s availability and effectiveness will be a question mark heading into the series. Without his 30 goals, the Preds’ anemic offense takes yet another hit. Let’s hope for their sake he is healthy, because this unit scores less than me in high school as it is.
How I see It:
After a roaring first half of the season and a huge divisional lead, the Blackhawks cooled off towards the end of the season almost as if they were bored. Injuries to Brian Campbell and Kim Johnsson had a hand in the drop off but a first round matchup with Nashville is the perfect elixir to cure their ills. Amazing how Nashville has the advantage in goal and on the blue line but still is a serious underdog in this series. The defensemen advantage should speak volumes considering the Hawks boast a top unit of Duncan Keith and Brent Seabrook. But Nashville being considered an underdog with advantages in both goal and on the back end is a testament to how explosive Kane, Toews and the Hawks forwards are. The Preds just don’t have the offensive horses to get into a seven game shoot out with the Hawks and win. Unless Chicago takes a massive dump like they just ate at an LA taco cart, or Nashville starts using gypsy curses or a herd of sluts to stymie and distract the Hawks, I don’t see this series going past five. Blackhawks in five.
(3) Vancouver Canucks vs. (6) Los Angeles Kings
Players to Watch:
Roberto Luongo, G, Canucks- Besides winning the Olympic Gold Medal as Canada’s backstop in February (in which he looked shaky), Luongo has suffered through his worst year as a pro. His playoff rep is marginal as it is and many are waiting to see if this hype machine lives up to what everyone thinks he is or continues to be overrated and unable to win the big one. And no, the Olympics don’t count. Dummy.
Drew Doughty, D, Kings- Doughty has already become one of the best defensemen in hockey which has resulted in a full-on man crush by yours truly (check out this erection!). He is extremely intelligent, highly mobile and has the chops to be a true shutdown d-man when applied to Vancouver’s Sedin line. If he is 75% successful, I love the Kings chances here.
How I See It:
The Canucks, surprisingly, gave up a ton of goals this season. Many people find this hard to believe with Roberto Luongo in the crease, but as was previously mentioned, Luongo is having an incredibly down season. In addition, his playoff history is less than spectacular (that would be an understatement to anyone who watched the Hawks series last year). Luckily, Vancouver also scores a ton of goals and MVP candidate and Art Ross winner Henrik Sedin is piloting this ship. I see a great long series here filled with overtimes and scoring. Both teams are dead even on the powerplay and penalty kill, so it should be a game of chicken as to who buckles first. The Kings can put the puck in the net as well and are one of the most exciting young teams in hockey. If they can nab Kovalchuk in the offseason and Jonathan Quick continues his steady development between the pipes, we will see a new Western power emerging that can challenge the Sharks and Blackhawks as far as top seed supremacy. In the here an now however, they are a bit of an energetic Cinderella and I STILL like their chances against the Canucks. They have the best defenseman in hockey (my opinion) in Drew Doughty and some offensive pop. This one is coming down to the wire and I might as well flip a coin. Heart says Kings, head says Luongo straightens himself out at least for a round. Canucks in seven great games.
Eastern Conference
(1) Washington Capitals vs. (8) Montreal Canadiens
Players to Watch:
Jaroslav Halak, G, Canadiens- I have never heard of PTSD coming as the result of a hockey series, but there’s a first time for everything. Halak is going to see more rubber flying his way than the PA’s for Digital Playground. He is going to have to have a legendary series for Montreal not to get embarrassed, let alone win. He is one of the lone bright spots on a roster full of stiffs (yes, we mean you Scott Gomez).
Alex Ovechkin, LW, Capitals- AO…nuff said.
How I See It:
The Capitals are a rock band/frat house masquerading as a world-class hockey team. They are young, cocky and seem to inspire equal party envy and hatred throughout the NHL landscape. They have the best player in the world (need I explain who this is?), a world class center in Nicklas Backstrom and the best offensive defenseman in the league in Mike Green. I am not even going to continue on talking about the secondary scoring and grit that this team has in spades. They are young, hungry and ready to avenge a painful seven game loss to archrival Pittsburgh last spring. The Canadiens? Well, they are lambs to the slaughter. No use pointing out how this one may play out. It’s an inevitability that even I can’t jinx. Caps in four.
(3) Buffalo Sabres vs. (6) Boston Bruins
Players to Watch :
Ryan Miller, G, Sabres- Because of the Olympics, Ryan Miller has reached household name status in the United States. Even my Mom knows who he is and she has never used the internet. He is the clear favorite for the Vezina trophy and should be in the running for the Hart. His performance alone between the pipes is one reason to give this horrendous series a shot.
Marc Savard, C, Bruins- Oh wait! He’s dead! Oooh…too soon?
How I See It:
This series is going to be boring and low scoring. Two great goaltenders in Miller and Tuukka Rask and two teams who have no idea how to score. The early favorite to win the “I got bored with this game so I decided to masturbate” award, this is the series to miss if there ever was one. Both teams have great penalty killing and horrendous power plays. If Tim Connolly comes back, we might see an advantage on offense for Buffalo, especially considering they have a few 20 goal scorers on the roster. In a weird note, the two largest players in the league will be facing off against each other in Bruins defenseman Zdeno Chara (who should be considered for the role of Jaws if he ever makes a comeback in any upcoming James Bond movies) and Tyler Myers, rookie d-man for the Sabres who is abnormally skinny and pimply-faced. They are both nearly seven feet tall and seem too tall for hockey. Their performance proves otherwise, but I digress. This series is going to six or seven excruciating games and I hope I don’t watch one second of it. Sabres in six.
Photo courtesy of Bruce Bennett/AP
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