Is This Some Sort of Jokinen?

With each passing week, the New York Rangers continue to resemble the group of pre-lockout mercenaries that came to identify the team and franchise during the first leg of Glen Sather’s New York Insanity Tour more and more. The only thing that was lacking thus far this season was the head-scratching desperation move that resulted in an unwanted, past-his-prime stiff falling into our laps. Well, as Sam Rosen would say, “The waiting is over!” The cherry was put on the sundae of misery last night with the acquisition of classic underachiever Olli Jokinen. The Blueshirts sent resident whiner and non-entity Ales Kotalik and snake bitten Chris Higgins to the Calgary Flames for Jokinen and pugilist Brandon Prust. The bright side of the deal for the Rangers is a combination platter of clearing some salary in Kotalik while obtaining (thankfully) a rental in Jokinen (UFA at season’s end).

The funniest side note of this trade involves Kotalik and his no trade clause. Yes, you read correctly. Glen Sather gave ALES KOTALIK a partial no trade. Anyway, Kotalik’s list of “can’t trade to” teams is only three deep but one of them includes Calgary. Not sure if this was plain old forgetfulness or a senior moment, but how can Glen Sather try to trade a guy to one of the only teams on his no trade list when he helped engineer the clause and include it in the contract to begin with? He signed the g-ddamn guy seven months ago! It baffles me and the irony/hilarity/horror of this side story is really flying under the radar. The deal was held up for a day due to this little caveat until Kotalik relented and figured that February in Western Canada was a lot warmer than the conditions in John “Fonzie” Tortorella’s dog house.

The guy I am really excited about in this deal is Prust. Seriously. He makes only $500K a year and ranks second in the NHL in fighting majors. This team needs some jam and some energy infused via barbarism and this will provide it. It might come at the expense of Aaron Voros, but really who cares? It’s too bad he is not a center, because then we could euthanize, I mean bench, Brian Boyle instead.

As for the big piece of the trade, Jokinen, the Rangers have done what we have come to expect: obtain an underachieving locker-room cancer whose reputation around the league is akin to that of…damn…I was going to say Sean Avery. Anyway, nobody likes to or wants to play with this guy. Sather landed him, presumably, to play with Marian Gaborik, but the question is why? Jokinen is a selfish, shooting center who is at the top of his game when he is battling and getting pucks at the net. He shoots. Gaborik shoots. Neither is a playmaker. So what am I missing?

Going by the scouting reports, his current MO is that he half-asses it and plays softer than vanilla ice-cream melting on a sidewalk in the middle of July. If it’s a game against a physical rival, forget about it. Man down. Where’s Olli? Can’t wait for the next Flyers game can you? IF, on the other hand, he performs at the level that makes him successful, we will have two pure shooters on one line. He will not pass. He will not set up Gaborik. He will not be a fit. Even if he is working hard. He had little under a year to form some sort of chemistry with one of the best goal-scorers of the last decade in Jarome Iginla, and that experiment looked a little like this: http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2217/2417429760_c824644ff6.jpg

So why will it work with Gaborik? It won’t. Classic Ranger move that I and a lot of other fans have become far too used to over the past decade plus. Thankfully the Olympics are the only speed bump in getting this season over with. A two week break and then the ship continues to hurtle towards Earth, destined for fiery, cataclysmic destruction. With Olli Jokinen riding shotgun.


Want your voice to be heard? Want management to clean house and build this franchise back to a level of honor and respectability? Then attend the “Fire Sather Rally” prior to the Sunday March 7th game against Buffalo at the Garden. Click the link for more details: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/event.php?eid=272851463916&ref=ts

Image Courtesy: Carlson/AP